Dear Ones! For the first time since the recent reception of those rude and annoying transmissions intermittently beamed our way from somewhere in the indeterminate vastness, our astronomers have finally managed to tracked down the strange signal, and found it originating from a gorgeous sand and surf planet in a system just a bit outside our galactic quadrant and – yes -- it is potentially habitable for us, a discovery those on the Population Council also hale as a big step in the ongoing search for "Nice places -- not just to visit, but to proudly call Home!" As some may recall, this Council was formed one day when it was perceived that there was suddenly more than two of us here. After all, we know that two is company, but three is definitely a crowd!
The slight down-side of this thrilling news, however, is that the resident teeming life-forms on this world are apparently involved in an increasingly accelerated campaign to render the lovely place uninhabitable, a nuisance that can readily be neutralized (if we act fast) by our efficient Agents from Stellar Pest & Climate Control Division. An easily engineered adjustment in the local star will increase the planet temperature, raising the oceanic water levels temporarily and washing away the land detritus in no time at all. Once the waters recede during the subsequent mop-up operation, we would have the whole globe to ourselves.
Dear Ones! This planet seems to be just the right size for our much-anticipated interstellar expansion -- it’s not too far away for our transports, and wouldn’t it be a shame to let it go to waste? Who knows when another such opportunity will present itself?
Potentially Habitable Planet Found
ReplyDeleteDear Ones! For the first time since the recent reception of those rude and annoying transmissions intermittently beamed our way from somewhere in the indeterminate vastness, our astronomers have finally managed to tracked down the strange signal, and found it originating from a gorgeous sand and surf planet in a system just a bit outside our galactic quadrant and – yes -- it is potentially habitable for us, a discovery those on the Population Council also hale as a big step in the ongoing search for "Nice places -- not just to visit, but to proudly call Home!" As some may recall, this Council was formed one day when it was perceived that there was suddenly more than two of us here. After all, we know that two is company, but three is definitely a crowd!
The slight down-side of this thrilling news, however, is that the resident teeming life-forms on this world are apparently involved in an increasingly accelerated campaign to render the lovely place uninhabitable, a nuisance that can readily be neutralized (if we act fast) by our efficient Agents from Stellar Pest & Climate Control Division. An easily engineered adjustment in the local star will increase the planet temperature, raising the oceanic water levels temporarily and washing away the land detritus in no time at all. Once the waters recede during the subsequent mop-up operation, we would have the whole globe to ourselves.
Dear Ones! This planet seems to be just the right size for our much-anticipated interstellar expansion -- it’s not too far away for our transports, and wouldn’t it be a shame to let it go to waste? Who knows when another such opportunity will present itself?