ass-backwards?

Perhaps spiritual life is practiced ass-backwards:

Instead of trying to shoehorn what is loved or feared into a predigested spiritual format as a means of being happy, it would be better to exercise a gentle firmness and allow what is loved or feared to lead you to the open fields of laughter.

Sure, it takes some courage and patience -- and those passing the collection plate may not be pleased -- but the outcome will be more trustworthy.