To the extent that anyone finds such suggestions personally compelling ....
Then I think it is worth investigating how much each or any beloved realm might be defined according to what it isn't.
Love is not a, b, c, d, e, f....
Freedom is not a, b, c, d, e, f....
Justice is not a, b, c, d, e, f....
Honesty is not a, b, c, d, e, f....
Equality is not a, b, c, d, e, f....
Peace is not a, b, c, d, e, f....
Goodness is not a, b, c, d, e, f....
Enlightenment is not a, b, c, d, e, f....
Etc. is not a, b, c, d, e, f....
I repeat -- it is as a personal matter and not, for the moment, how any of this plays out in the public square or in some pan-banging arena: How much of what something is in a personal pantheon finds its meaning and impact solely or even largely according to what it is not?
Peace is not war; equality is not segregation; love is not anger; enlightenment is not delusion ... like that.
I don't mention this because I think that defining values according to what they are not is somehow wrong or stupid or even cruel. I think it is more common than not and quite human into the bargain. But just because something is common and human does not mean it doesn't deserve consideration.
It deserves consideration because there is a linked-in tendency to start believing that because anyone might say what something isn't, they therefore have corralled what it is. And resting on those laurels invariably produces a sense of dissatisfaction and dis-ease. Saying what something is simply cannot touch what it actually is and this disconnect is worth noting because everyone would like to be happy and this is not a happy-making agenda.
It is often easy to say what I am fighting against, but not so easy to say what I am fighting for. For example, for years I have found myself sympathetic to the critiques of Buddhism -- its hypocrisies in lineage, its errors in emphasis as displayed in the west or whatever. I have been in contact with those who made what I consider very good critiques ... very thoughtful and careful critiques that displayed a greater historical ability than I have. Intellectually and emotionally, those critiques made sense to me and I applauded them: They were far more sensible and practical in my mind than a lie-down-and-spread-your-legs sycophancy and adoration I sensed in other quarters. Corrections were necessary and the critics pointed the way.
Those corrections required that something or some set of things be removed if Buddhism were to flourish in a more perfect way ... some even used the word "authentic." But when I asked, as best I could, what it was that such critics envisioned -- what was left after the detritus was stripped away -- not one of them responded and for a long time I thought my question might be impertinent or poorly asked. Did I have bad breath or something? Didn't it make sense to ask what, precisely, anyone might be for if they could use so much energy depicting what they were against?
These days, I am a little more relaxed and feel a little less guilty or inferior. No, I still don't think much of falling into a mindless and adoring swoon. And yes, I do appreciate carefully-crafted critiques. But what adds a little relief to my panorama is the recognition that saying what something isn't is about all any human being can muster. The trick is not to imagine that because you can say what it isn't does not mean you can say what it is. And that if you tried to say what it is, you would immediately be beset by demons.
What love and freedom and justice and honesty and equality and peace and goodness and enlightenment and community and compassion and kindness aren't may be a very good exercise. But imagining into the bargain that what they aren't is the same as what they are is a foolish and upsetting business.
A little humility will probably oil the wheels of unsatisfactoriness. Relying on what it isn't as a means of saying what it is has all the earmarks of an unpleasant failure. Peace does not come cheap.
Apples and oranges are both fruits, but to say an apple is an orange would be stupid.
Take a bite -- you'll see what I mean.
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