Sunday, April 16, 2017

"do you remember me?"

It's one thing to tease my advancing forgetfulness with friends or acquaintances likely to be suffering the same affliction. You can chuckle a bit or weep openly if necessary. This is cosa nostra, our thing.

But it is quite another to be bare-ass accosted ... out of no where ... by the same set of facts.

Yesterday, sitting on a low retaining wall outside the barbershop I had patronized some minutes before, I was enjoying the sunshine as I waited for my wife to pick me up. It was good to be outside, to feel the sun, feel the air, watch the almost non-existent activities as cars passed. And as I sat there, a man approached. Then sat on the wall next to me and said calmly, "Do you remember me?"

And I didn't, though his German accent rang some bells and it turned out Samuel's son and one of mine inhabited a similar high school class together. But I really didn't remember. He had the social-working demeanor of his profession -- taking care of 'challenged' kids in schools ... a poker face that remained in place even when confronting a serial killer. Texas Hold 'Em lips is what I think of. We chatted. He said I had once taken him to the zendo I built in the backyard here. I really didn't remember that, though I remember a general trend of trying to lure people in by giving a cook's tour of the 12x16 building. He wanted to know if I still did Buddhism. "I'll do Buddhism if you like," I said, feeling more at ease than when my cook's tour frequency had been in play. He laughed ... "you 'do Buddhism'" he repeated and we both chuckled. We had a nice chat and pretty soon my wife came and I wasn't a Buddhist any more ... or perhaps I was more so. How I loved it all once. And now .... Buddhism is sensible for those inclined.

But these days, my "finis" point so to speak refers back to a time when I asked a Zen teacher how to teach others. "Tell 'em 80%," he replied, "and let 'em find out 20." That never sat right with me, though back then I wouldn't have dared to contradict a "teacher." Then, by suspicion, and now by conviction, my feeling is, "tell 'em 100% and let 'em find out 100%."

As if there were some other choice.

3 comments:

  1. If you tell 'em what you think you know, they'll find out something.

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  2. Loved this post. Thank you.

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  3. There are many other valid guidelines besides 80/20 and 100/100.

    One is expressed in an Oriental saying, possibly Confucian. The best student teacher relationship is that the teacher teaches just one-quarter of the material and the teacher expects the student to figure out the other three-quarters.

    (This may be true at any level of teaching.)

    The other is only about the teacher. The teacher prepares to teach content for one-fourth of the time with the students; the other three quarters is devoted to entertaining the students.

    (Makes me wonder just how well modern American education programs have been preparing teachers.)

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