"dearest"

The word "dearest" is partly defined by an Internet dictionary as meaning

-- used about something that you want or hope for more than anything else

-- most loved or liked

The spam email slipped under the door each morning almost invariably has one or more missives beginning with "dearest," often "dearest in Christ."

And who would not like to be cherished in a way that attends on the word "dearest?" To be most-loved, most-liked, most cared-for? Warts and all, you are "dearest." It's delicious and speaks to a deep longing, however churlishly skeptical anyone might be.

For all I know, the emailers or others who employ this word truly believe in their warm wishes. But I also know that those using the word almost invariably wind up asking for money or wooing some willingness to accede to their power or understanding. "Dearest" is a leverage word masquerading as a kindness: The user uses a crowd-pleaser to please him- or herself... often without the willingness to admit the ploy.

For my own purposes, I have learned to 86 communications that begin with "dearest." If someone wants to address me, they can use my name and fire at will. This is a greater kindness in my mind.

But there is something dreary about distrusting "dearest."

Isn't there something or someone who is truly "dearest?"

I wonder who or what that might be.