Wednesday, October 4, 2017

"ripe" times

"Ripe," the doctor said yesterday after examining a cataract that had grown considerably in my left eye over the two years since my last visit.

"Ripe?!"

Suddenly I was transformed into a pineapple.

Bananas were "ripe." Farts were "ripe." But a cataract?

But that seems to be part of the lingua franca among eye doctors when assessing cataracts. I was "ripe."

We chatted the topic back and forth. What to do, what the batting averages were for removing a cataract ("98%," he said blithely, "you'll think your other eye is the bad one."), and whether I would be allowed to intone "aaaarrrrrgh!" after I received an eye patch that is a piece of the recuperating procedure.

I had neglected to ask him what the downside possibilities were, but I'll get my chance tomorrow when I see another doc who will assess what he will operate on.

Reading being my soporific-of-choice before going to sleep at night, and reading and writing at the computer being an addiction of sorts, I went to see the doctor for the blurriness of things. It all sounds pretty hum-drum at the moment ("it takes longer for the nurses to get you to the operating room than it does for the operation," he said. "The operation takes about 10 minutes.")  Apparently others are more leery of the knife/eye connecting tissue, but as long as they give me good drugs, I will be anyone's slave. No point in putting it off. So, tomorrow I guess I will find out what century I can expect to have the 'procedure' done in.

Me, I'm still in pineapple mode -- just another "ripe" old fart.

2 comments:

  1. Better ripe than expired I guess.

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  2. Good luck with the surgery!

    Have a speedy recovery!!

    Give a heads up before going under the knife.

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