a sense of belonging

An Internet dictionary defines the word "belong" as:

1.

a : to be suitable, appropriate, or advantageous ( a dictionary belongs in every home)

b : to be in a proper situation (a man of his ability belongs in teaching)

2.

a : to be the property of a person or thing -- used with to (the book belongs to me)

b : to be attached or bound by birth, allegiance, or dependency -- usually used with to (they belong to their homeland)

c : to be a member of a club, organization, or set -- usually used with to (she belongs to a country club)

3.

  to be an attribute, part, adjunct, or function of a person or thing (nuts and bolts belong to a car)

4.

  to be properly classified

 Connection, comfort, suitability.

And yet what a two-edged sword a sense of belonging can be. Does it belong to me or do I belong to it ... and in either case is the sense of belonging true or fabricated? Human beings long to belong and yet can find that belonging exacts unacceptable prices. Can what is free be limited? Can what is limited be free?

For example, I like Buddhism and have in the past belonged to groups dedicated to Buddhist practice. Belonging inspired my practice and occasionally produced new friends. But nowadays, if someone says casually, "you're a Buddhist, right?" there is a part of me that bridles at the limitation in the same way a soccer mom might bridle at being called a "soccer mom." It may be true in one sense, but the idea that the price of belonging was to restrict other possibilities -- perhaps a poker player or a singer or a social gadfly -- well, no thanks.

Belonging is cozy and warm and inspiring and human, perhaps, but there is also the potential for smothering or disparaging or throttling other dances. A sense of belonging ... a sense of stand-still death.

I'm just muddling around here. No doubt Buddhists and others will have cunning explanations.

I'm just muddling.

Muddling gives me a sense of belonging, perhaps.