Wednesday, August 11, 2010

my kingdom for a joke!

What I could use now is a good dirty joke ... or even a good clean one.

Having spent the morning between 5 and 1130 working on a bureaucratic form -- make sure of spelling, commas, tone, facts etc. -- I feel as if there were sludge in my thinking department.

Jokes are high-octane, on-target, blackboard-erasers.

Funny how laughter or sneezing or any number of other things just seem to clear things up and put you on track.

Zazen ain't bad either.


  1. Q: Why did Karl Marx only drink herbal tea?

    A: Because he believed that proper tea is theft.



  2. Harry -- Aaaaaaaaarrrrrrgh! And here I thought we were friends. :)

  3. I MUST forward Harry's joke to my husband. He's the king of goofy jokes!

    Try this to lighten your load. #9 is my favorite:

  4. We all some humor do need

    If a blonde and a brunette fell off a building, who would hit the ground first?
    The brunette - the blonde would have to stop for directions!


    The assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve.
    "Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"


    What should you do if you girlfriend starts smoking?
    Slow down and use a lubricant.


    Who is the most popular guy at the nudist colony?
    The guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts.


    ... and finally this one I shall I leave you with

    The priest in a small Irish village loved the cock and ten hens he kept in the hen house behind the church. But one Saturday night the cock went missing! The priest knew that cock fights happened in the village so he started to question his parishioners in church the next morning.

    During Mass, he asked the congregation, "Has anybody got a cock?"

    All the men stood up.

    "No, no," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock?"

    All the women stood up.

    "No, no," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock that doesn't belong to them?"

    Half the women stood up.

    "No, no," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen MY cock?"

    All the nuns, three altar boys, two priests and a goat stood up.

    Now that was baaaaaaaaaaddddd....

  5. Q: What's black and dangerous and sits in a tree?

    A. A crow with a machine gun.

  6. My friend Tony is black so I asked him one day What type of jokes black people told about white people since I had heard all the reverse and he said ...
    Whats long and hard on a white man ?
    I said , I don't know what ? to which he answered ,
    Nothing . Anita

  7. So, you like dirty jokes, eh?

    Here's a really dirty one:


    How much dirt is in a hole with a 300 foot diameter and is 300 feet deep?

    (Hint: the Volume of a Cylinder is the area of the base times the height.)

    None. It's a ................... hole.
    Gotcha? I betcha!!

  8. 2 blonds are on opposites sides of the river bank , One yells to the other , Can you tell me how to get to the other side ? and the other blond yells back you are on the other side .

    ( Hmm... If ya' traded those blonds for Buddhist's...)

  9. How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

    At least two.

  10. Lol@Christopher .. How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb ?
    Only one but ..The light bulb has to really want to change , Anita