Tuesday, November 9, 2010

hospital

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After nine months or better of taking an increasing number of pills, some of which had physiological effects worse than the psychological downer they could create, today I will go to the hospital for a cardiac ablation, a one-day procedure that hopes to realign the electrical current in the heart and, as a side effect, get me off some of the medication I can't help but think of as "those damned pills."

I am trying to suppress the kid-before-Christmas anticipation that goes with this medical effort, but it still rises up, irrespective of down-side possibilities. Some part of me dances with the Tooth Fairy who will make things all better ... the perfect gift inside an as-yet-unwrapped present under the tree. The whole thing glows, I imagine, because it has a pro-active feel to it ... "get 'er done!" But what, precisely, will get done, what the actual results might be, how I will feel and be able to act post-facto I have no real idea. At 70 years old, I can't expect e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g to get fixed, but even few small steps would be very welcome... not, for example, spending periodic nights in the emergency room only to turn around and come home, waiting for the next event.

Who knows, maybe I could even gain some weight. Over the 9 months of being a pharmacological experiment, I lost 40 pounds, some of it muscle mass, and I would be grateful to eat something other than bunny food and to stop looking like a poster-child for Bergen-Belsen.

It's an adventure all right.
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9 comments:

  1. I hope this works and you feel better! We'er looking forward to another 20 years of you.

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  2. At the risk of offending, I offer you the following:

    There is a way of using one's mind that goes by many names such as "the power of suggestion," "as you think, so you become," "positive thinking," "the Law of Success," and "the Law of Attraction." Briefly, stated one's words and thoughts carry vibrations out to the universe and those same vibrations return to you setting the stage to actualize the ideas sent out.

    Affirmations are used to put these thoughts into a verbal form that one recites to attain one's goals.

    Affirmations are to be formulated clearly, in a positive, declarative phrasing. Strongly believe in them.

    It is strongly recommended that one begin each day reciting one's affirmations several times.

    Also, it is highly recommended that one recite them before and after one meditates, or does deep relaxation exercises.

    Here's a suggested list based on a reading of your wishes in your article. You should add to them as needed and rephrase them to make them yours.

    Let this procedure go well!

    I will feel better, stronger and healthier!

    I will eat tastier and more nutritious food.

    I will get to my ideal weight and right body mass.


    Best regards and happy results!

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  3. Be well Genkaku, and positive thinking is the way to go.

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  4. Genkaku,

    I'm one of the anonymous readers of your blog, which is filled with uncompromising wisdom and a great sense of humor. Having quit the regular news except for the NYT, your blog has become one of my regular and favorite destinations. It almost never fails to stimulate inquiry into the nature of things. As Quakers say, will hold you in the Light.

    Looking forward to many more wonderful years of reading Genkaku-again, with the emphasis on again.

    Gratefully,

    John

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  5. Thanks for the thoughts, one and all. It's all over, the doctor seemed satisfied and, except for a bit of inventive bleeding, all's well on the home front.

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  6. Very happy to hear things went well.

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  7. "inventive bleeding"

    Isn't that what happens to creative people who work very hard?

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  8. "inventive bleeding"

    Leeches?

    Happy to hear that the procedure was successful.

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