Saturday, April 21, 2012


Enthusiasms are delicious. They course through the mind like cheetahs at 120 mph -- sleek, fluid, unimpeded and perfect.

Enthusiasms know no questions.

They are woo-hoo and wow like some recent religious convert. Being around someone whose enthusiasm you do not share is like being subjected to an Oklahoma tornado ... oh shit -- where's the escape route? And being around someone whose enthusiasm you do share is ... what? ... perhaps it is the first hint that the perfect yumminess is not as perfect as it was a moment ago.

The Catch-22 of enthusiasms that linger and nag is that enthusiasms are only as good as the tests to which anyone puts them. And putting an enthusiasm to the test undermines the sleek perfection and wholeness that enthusiasm knew at its inception. Enthusiasm without any investigation is just a delicious circle jerk ... delicious, yes, but equally, a circle jerk.

Nobody wants to examine anything as delicious and compelling as an enthusiasm. There is too much joy and certainty in NOT examining it, in simply wallowing and soaking up the joy. The joy addresses the tests to which enthusiasms might be put: "What a fucking spoil sport!" Sincerity of emotion owns the scene ... I'm so sincere, I must be right... right and righteous in my sincerity.

But without testing enthusiasm, without finding the practical applications and drawbacks, it seems to me that anyone might be left with the life of a teenager who has discovered the wonders of masturbation and has no sense that the best is yet to come.

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